


and if this is heaven (i might have to tell you)

by jules2001



Category: The Strokes
Genre: Angst, M/M, Multi, Tension, and Angery, and sad, julian is Confused, rowdy boys, the boys are back at it
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-11
Updated: 2020-05-11
Packaged: 2021-03-02 23:08:00
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 993
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24134836
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jules2001/pseuds/jules2001
Summary: It’s been days like this, of Julian just moping around the apartment, lurking in corners. Maybe weeks, but he’s lost count and track of time. He wouldn’t even look at Albert, let alone speak to him and let him know what was wrong. After all, he was part of his problem.
Relationships: Julian Casablancas/Albert Hammond Jr., Julian Casablancas/Fab Moretti, Julian Casablancas/Fab Moretti/Albert Hammond Jr.
Comments: 4
Kudos: 13





	and if this is heaven (i might have to tell you)

**Author's Note:**

> fabulibert. title from hot chip's "shake a fist".
> 
> read it. now

It’s been days like this, of Julian just moping around the apartment, lurking in corners. Maybe weeks, but he’s lost count and track of time. He wouldn’t even look at Albert, let alone speak to him and let him know what was wrong. After all, he was part of his problem.

  
  


Julian couldn’t possibly fathom the fact that two of his bandmates were not only somewhat gay, but into each other. It made him sick to his stomach, nauseated, and want to throw up all over their affections. Because really, how could they do that to him? Especially since they, well, no. They didn’t know how he felt. Julian didn’t even know how he felt.

Albert made his stomach twist in knots, over and over and over into a tangled heap of intestines. His best friend, his roommate, was the one he thought about first thing in the morning before coffee or a cigarette. He knew that very well, except at night when he’s all alone in his room, his thoughts travel to Fab’s apartment, into Fab’s room, and into Fab’s bed, tangled in the sheets with the drummer. It confused Julian to no end. Swirls of confusion, anger, and sadness in his gut led to a pack a day, smoking alone in his room. 

  
  


Today, he emerges from his room, soon met by the distant voice of Fab Moretti. He lingers in the hallway to pick up his conversation. 

  
  


_“He hasn’t said anything to you yet?”_

_“Not a word, Fab. All he does is smoke and drink in his room. Not only is it worrisome, but it’s depressing.”_

_“How long has it even been?”_

_“Nine days? At least. It’s just, weird. Like, if I happen to pass by him on the odd times he leaves his room, he gives me this look. Like I killed his dog or something.”_

_“Should I try talking to him? Maybe….”_

  
  


Julian snorts, pushing himself off the wall, much to the surprise of Fab and Albert. Julian walks with his hands in his sweatpants pockets, dragging his feet. 

“Yeah, maybe you should try talking to him, Fab. That’ll help. That’ll help sooo fucking much,” his words are laced with malice. He doesn’t even recognize his own voice.

“Hey,” Fab suddenly gets up from the couch, “did we do something to you? Did we do something wrong?” Albert reaches out to grab his wrist. Julian winces. 

“Oh, fuck off, man. Like you care, anyway. Why don’t you ask Albert, huh, Fabrizio? When your tongue isn’t down his throat, of course.”

Albert and Fab share a look of confusion, but when Fab turns back to Julian, he’s enraged. He pulls away from Albert’s grip to step towards Julian.

“What the fuck is your problem? What is wrong with you?” Fab spits, his body rigid in defense. When Julian doesn’t respond, Fab pushes at his shoulders. “C’mon, spit it the fuck out!”

“Woah, woah, hey,” Albert rises from the couch, extreme concern painted on his face, but before he can mediate the situation, Julian tackles Fab to the ground by his neck. Fab tries to hit him, but Julian quickly has him pinned to the ground, knee planted on his chest, and he’s struggling to contain his flailing arms. 

  
  


“Get the fuck off of me, bastard!” 

“Fuck you, fuck both of you! I fucking trusted you guys!”

The look Fab gives him is wild and incredulous. “Trusted us?! What the hell did we do to break your…..” He looks to Albert, then to Julian, then back to Albert. “We… Julian…?

  
  


There are tears in Julian’s eyes, threatening to spill over and dampen Fab’s white shirt. 

“I don’t fucking get it. It’s not fucking fair! You fags get each other, and what do I get? Jack fucking shit?” Fab stops moving, only stares at the man crying on his chest. Albert sits on the coffee table, watching Julian fall apart.

“I don’t know what’s wrong with me, Fab, I’m sorry. I’m sorry, I’m so, so sorry.”

“Hey, I…” Fab reaches up to brush Julian’s hair out of his face, “I don’t exactly understand what’s going on. I just want to help, Julian. You just have to tell us how you feel.”

“Fab…” Albert starts, looking at him sideways, arms crossed, “I think… we should tell him.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah.”

“Wh-what?” Julian looks at Albert, then back at Fab. “Tell me what? Tell me what?!”

  
  


“Okay, Jules, bear with us. This might be a little hard to explain.” Albert cringes, trying to think of the right words. “We, uh... “

“We like you.”

“Oh, um, yeah. And-”

“-and each other, at the same time.”

“Okay,” Albert laughs nervously, wringing his hands, “I guess Fab will explain it, then.”

  
  


Julian furrows his brows, getting off of Fab and standing up slowly. “You… wait, what? Is that possible?”

“I don’t know, I guess? Like, we kind of came to terms with it. We figured out that we liked each other while on the subject of the fact that we liked you.” Fab waves his fingers in the air to connect the dots. Julian is utterly dumbfounded. 

“Yeah, Jules, I… I’ve liked you for quite a while, probably since Switzerland, I just didn’t know if you… you know, and then Fab and I got to talking.”

  
  


“I didn’t… I didn’t know that was possible,” Julian scratches his head, “I like both of you, I think, but how does that work?”

“We can make it work,” Albert smiles, beckoning Julian to him, “I can’t believe you were sulking around here because you figured out you have a crush on us.”

“Shut up,” Julian wipes his eyes with the back of his hand and sits next to Albert, laying his head on his shoulder. Fab gets up off the floor, shaking his head as he dusts himself off.

+

"Are we gonna ignore the fact that Julian attacked me?"

"You pushed me!"

"Can we please not have our first fight..."

  
  


**Author's Note:**

> thank you for reading (even tho i told u to)


End file.
